Depression

she prefers boys who are good looking ~
she prefers boys who can always accompany her .
she prefers boys who can always hang out with her .
she prefers boys that are better than me .
she prefers boys who can make her feel safe .

she wants her boyfriend to be but i fail to do .
she just want her boyfriend to be good looking .
the boy suits her well .
i dont have any sadness or depression ,
i will repect her decision that break with me and together with him .
i will wont disturb her anymore .
she dont even take me as friend .
i dont wan to know it
i want to die heart on her .
she made me cant concentrate on many things
at school , friends can make me forget everything she did it to me .
she doesnt want my love ,
she doesnt want my care ,
she just push me away and sweet with another guy .

WHAT"S BROTHER ?
IMPOSSIBLE ?
what's this word means ?
she said before ,
but she still prefers him .
she treat me cool .
because she knows than if she msg with me .
that guy will be jealous .
but i also dont want this kind of reply .
so annoying .
like treating me as enemy .
then i prefer dont msg her anymore .
let her be what she want to be .
i not her anyone
so I DONT CARE !
i guess i dont have feeling to her anymore .
after i heard her things
i felt nothing .
is that good for me ?
really ?
i guess many of my friends willl argee this .
my phone had been confiscated .
because my cousin .
i wanted to help her .
i take her as a cousin very seriously
but so suprise that she dont even care .
that was quite shock .
the girl i loved before .
she taught me something new
althought she break me
but i learned that love must choose the one that suit u most .
i cant be so direct .
cant simply put feeling to a girl .
i guess i needed to think properly
and know the girl well first .
only decide .
ya .
cant be childish anymore .
many ppl will worried .
PMR coming .
i hope that i can do it well .
i cant be depress anymore
made me cant concentrate well .
kinda regret that my attitude and the way i do things
very direct
must change .
love is totally unfair .
but now i dont need it yet .
i still 15 years old .
i wont simply put feeling to a girl anymore .
hurted twice .
i cant be that foolish anymore .

so go on girl .
i will be fine without you in my life !
i mean it
appreciate what you have girl ~
love to me , in my life
is already meaningless .
now i dont want to love anyone anymore !
after my pmr
i will only choose .
i wont be so immature
to go and hit a guy or what .
i will just take as gave the guy a present .
rape it with a ribbon and give her to him .
i dont need her anymore .
i just need friends
friends in my life is ENOUGH already .
now she in riding somebody else car .
lols .
what should i care .
she not my who also .
someone touched my fs before .
i know who is it .
but fine i also dont want to msg her .

now she hates me i think will be better for both of us
let her thinks i'm not a good guy better still
let her thinks i'm just a guy that want faces
let her thinks i'm a bad person ,
i guess like this is better for me and her .

depression ?
sadness ?
moody ?
scare ?
no more !

learning to love again .
hope it happens

go on girl .